No Room, No Room!

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about energy, reality being what we create, karmic return/energy spent is energy returned, etc.  I don’t think that, as living entities, we operate in a complete vacuum when it comes to the expenditure of energy.    We create our own realities by what we put out to the rest of the world – if you think someone is out to get you, eventually someone will start wondering what you’re trying to hide and begin digging around in your private matters.  Self-fulfilling prophesy!

I have a tendency to trust everyone, which leaves me wide open to be blindsided in those instances when someone decides not to play nice and does something really shitty.  It actually doesn’t happen as often as you might think.  There’s a song by the band Rush that basically says, I believe in the decency of people, but we read about the exceptions every day.  And that’s true.  You don’t hear about the kid that helped another pick up their books after everything went skidding down the hall – you only hear about the kid that went ballistic and stabbed another.  You don’t hear about the community that came together to help a family whose house burned down – you just hear about the arsonist that’s been torching homes.

It actually causes me physical pain to hear about all the awful things that we are capable of doing to each other.  When I was younger, I was out there doing everything I could to work as an activist, fighting for equality and tolerance.  I’m not sure why I can’t do it anymore, but conflict and drama (and there is ALWAYS drama!) has caused me to pull away from it all. 

I cannot handle drama at all.  It serves no purpose other than drawing attention to someone who isn’t happy with themselves.

So if I walk away from something, it’s not that I don’t care…..well, ok, in some cases, I don’t care.  But more than likely, I just can’t handle it.  It’s taken me a long time to recognize this and respect my own needs.  I do try to do what I can, but if I’m screwed up, I’m not going to be any good to anyone else.  If anything, I’ll be a hindrance.  And yes, there’s been a couple of things happen that have made me consider my role in the drama and conflict.  I’m just going to take care of what needs to be taken care of, and if anyone else really wants to get all offended, well, I just really don’t have anything to say about that.

Except maybe you should consider the reality you’re creating for yourself.